I always thought kinks, fetishes, or new sexual interests were something concretely formed early in life. Exposed to fetish at an young age (on accident by my own discovery, being that I was curious child who read a lot), I sorted out on my own that the dominant/submissive roles were simply something that one had from sexual awakening. This thinking was, I thought, confirmed, when I hit puberty and realized my interest was much less in the boys my own age and much more in their fathers. After all, the fathers seemed very well in control, some of them were teachers who easily handled a classroom of adults without fear. These things (and the submissive side they brought out) appealed to me and, with my fascination for hands, I thought I had my kinks well sorted.
Then, one day, my boyfriend expressed his interest in me wearing a strap on.
Well, that sounded good. Hot, even. The more I thought about it, even the dangerous thrill I got from thinking about him sucking my ‘cock’, I quickly and easily tucked it away into my list of interests.
He brought up the idea of me dominating him, albeit perhaps more subtly than one would think. I was game, though a little nervous.
Then, we got into a discussion about me wearing his boxers and how sexy he found it. He laughed, asking if I’d feel the same way about him wearing some of my underwear. I started to laugh too, amused at the image, until I thought about it a little more. He has great legs, and how good would he look with my underwear pooled around his ankles while I suck him off? Well, that one got tucked away into the proverbial filing cabinet too.
Much to my surprise the kinks and interests have continued to pile up. We talk through them as best we can, working the delicate lines of trust and control, gender and play, exploring our fantasies and having a blast while doing so.
I wonder, sometimes, how we’re going to discuss kinks with our children (when the come, and when they’re old enough to have that level of a sexual talk). Until then, I think the best thing is to keep talking and keep having fun. Practice make perfect, and practice, I’ve found, makes more kinks.
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